Sometime Around Midnight
by beautywithin22
Summary: She smiles at him, that come hither look she's always given him. Ten/Rose.


**AN: A fic me and dreaamer (doctose). on livejournal wrote. Post-Doomsday. Pre-S4.**

The Doctor steps out of the TARDIS, the cold air of London hitting his face like a hard slap. He no longer whines or whimpers. He walks on, his eyes empty, his mind and body oblivious to the world around him. He continues down the street, stopping as he passes a club. He walks in, some hope left in him. Perhaps he can defy his biology and actually get drunk. He's intent on doing so, even if it kills him. The bartender asks him what he'll have, and he says nothing. The band is playing a song about forgetting yourself. He feels this song is a soundtrack to his feelings. His eyes flit across the dark room, across the dance floor, and he sees her.

She's standing across the room, a small, weak smile on her face. He thinks the the piano is a melancholy soundtrack to her smile. His eyes widen a bit, but still remain empty. He won't get his hopes up. She smiles at him, that come hither look she's always given him. She's wearing a gorgeous white dress, and he thinks she looks gorgeous. He hasn't seen her in a while. A very long while. And oh, how good it feels to set eyes on her again.

He can't bring himself stop looking at her. He watches her every move and sees her smile. The smile that was his favorite in the universe, and he missed it along with every other thing about her. The room suddenly starts to spin, but he doesn't care, all her cares about is seeing her. His Rose.

Her voice brings him back to his senses. She says hello and asks if he's okay but he can only bring himself to nod in reply. When she walks away he thinks about the things he's always wanted to do to her like touch her lips with his and love her like there was no tomorrow, but's it too late, they'll never get to experience what lovers do,and she'll never know the way he feels about her, the way he felt when she smiled, laughed, talked. She's never going to know that he loved her, and that hurts.

With this new revelation comes a wave of old memories, washing through his mind. Memories of what happened, what hadn't happened, and what never would happen. His mind begins to reel with emotion, as the line between fantasies and memories blurred, and he no longer knows which was which; what was up, what was down, left or right. For the first time in a long while he feels completely and utterly hopeless. There's nothing left for him now. Nothing left in the universe for him. No place for him. He feels painfully lost. A thick fog fills his mind and he can no longer see what lies ahead of him. He is hopeless and homeless in the dreadful haze. Perhaps he had succeeded. Perhaps he could get drunk. All those years, not being able to feel what a human feels. It was overwhelming.

When he sees her leave he feels his two hearts break all over again. This is it, he won't see her again. He knew he shouldn't have come, but he couldn't stop himself. . Seeing her again bought all the memories he had tried to forget flooding back. He feels numb. As every second goes by he's becoming less aware of his surroundings,until a passer by tells him he's seen a ghost. He has. He's seen someone who no longer exists in this world, who's dead. So technically, he has. And she wasn't alone. She was with someone. Someone who looked familiar; he couldn't quite make out the face, but he didn't care enough to pay attention. He makes his way outside, back to the cold air of London.

He's walking underneath the streetlights. They shine brightly above him, casting an eerie glow on his disheveled appearance. Passersby are staring at him, but he doesn't care. He's too drunk to notice, much less care. His empty eyes looks determinedly ahead of him as he staggers forward. He's done it. He's defied his species. What now? He had nothing else. Nothing left. He doesn't care what he looks like, or what people think of him, because it's all over. The world is falling apart around him. His world. Everything is falling apart.

Nothing else matters. He just needs to see her. Nothing else matters. He breaks into a run. He sees her in the distance, then she fades.

He needs to find her. Nothing else matters. He needs to find her. When he does, she'll break him in two. He keeps on running as fast as he can, knowing at it will kill him but he has to see her. In the end nothing matters, except her. Rose.


End file.
